A Letter To Paul..

A fellow heart friend on mine, Paul Cardall, received a new heart after being on the waiting list for over a year. This was a very emotional and happy event for me and I wanted to post the letter that I wrote him.

To My Inspiring Friend,

It was absolute act of God and his grace that I met your wife in the NICU several months ago. In that moment, she was truly an angel to me because she gave me some sort of relief that I had needed to hear. She told me of her husband, and how he had been on the wait-list for a heart transplant. In that moment, CHD felt as normal to me as someone with blue eyes. It felt like there was so much hope. It didn't feel like a death sentence or an unbearable burden, all because there was a man out there, a GROWN man, who was living and thriving spiritually. He was beating CHD, beating it well- which meant something profoundly significant to me; it was beatable.

Paul, I want you to know that in so many ways you have given me hope that I would not otherwise have. My son does not have a complex congenital heart defect like yours. In fact, I really shouldn't complain about his CHD. But as a mother I have spent countless nights crying and crying and crying and crying and crying and crying myself to sleep.... all because the future scares me. I'm terrified of it. I'm not sure what Andrew's life will be like, what he will be able to do, what toll the defect will take.

You are the face to me of Andrew's future. I can see it more clearly now and I can see how well he can live it.

A doctor can only tell me that Andrew is probably going to live through this but you showed me that you can live through it well. His future looks bright to me because you have illuminated the path. And not only have you shown me that the path is there, you have shown me that it can be experienced beautifully.

I am so grateful to God and to you for giving me the inspiration to get through the hard times. I hope that one day Andrew can meet you. I hope your story can give him the same courage and stamina it has given me when he is struggling through the hard times. Thank you for what you have gone through, not just for yourself and family but also for all the other heart families out there. I know it has been a horribly rough road, and I know there are still going to be hurdles but please know that you are giving us all strength when you conquer these trials. Andrew and I have prayed for you and are grateful to Heavenly Father for answering our prayers, as well as everyone else out there who have prayed for you. It means a lot to us. You mean a lot to us.

Sincerely,
Amber T.