Oh, Christmas Tree! Oh, Christmas Tree!

I love this tree! I named her Violet.... get it? We already had a pretty good tree but I was walking trough Wal-mart and I saw this purple tree for 20 bucks! PURPLE!!!! I'm a purple freak. Then I added more purple to it and some cool colors and volia! I'm sad that it's time to take it down now. It's made me happy, maybe I should leave it up for the rest of the year. Matt would love that....lol.

Cheating Death....

Okay, So I didn't even realize that I had this picture stored on my computer but I came across it recently. It is significant to me for one reason; one week before this picture was taken a doctor took a saw to my head peeled back my scalp and sawed open my skull to remove a tiny bone off some nerves that were inflamed and dying because of Bells Palsy I had contracted. Scientifically it is called a crainiotomy, I call it torture.

A year later I had my gums peeled back and my jaw cut open to get out an infection. This was done by an oral surgeon. Unfortunately, because I was pregnant at the time he couldn't give me any laughing gas or knock me out, I had to do all of it with a shot of local antesthetic. Ouchy.

My most recent stunt was getting HELLP Syndrome, which nobody ever seems to have heard of because it is extremely rare. It just means I had really dangerous preeclampsia that was going to give me seizures and kill the baby and I if they didn't deliver me. I was 8 months pregnant at the time. The epidural didn't work of course because my platelets were so low. I did 22 hours of pitocin induced labor. I've heard inducing makes the contractions longer. Also the Magnesium Sulfate I was taking to discourage seizures was pretty bad medication. It made me lose my memory. I thought I was going crazy and I didn't even know I had a baby after my c-section. I got really bad panic attacks, several in a row at the hospital.

My husband and I joke that like a cat I have 9 lives. With the pneumonia, cellulitous and mono that I have we guess I've been through about 5 lives. I'm really blessed that God has kept me here. I have a pain threshold, I'm okay even though I've been through a lot. But what kills me, what I just can't handle is that my baby seems to have taken after me in the health department. He spent 9 days in the NICU which were the worst days of my life. If you've never had a child in the NICU there is just know what to ever understand or know. Bringing him home was the happiest day of my life. I thought we were out of the woods. I was wrong. I was so wrong. Now he goes to cardiology at Primary Children's Hospital to watch his heart. I know the day is coming that once again I'll be sitting next to his bed. If I were given the chance, I would take all of this for him. It breaks my heart to see him go through all of this. I'm glad that I can sort of understand him though, we can cheat death together. I'll even donate him the last 4 lives I've been holding on to.

The Big 2-5!

So, I never posted in November. Life gets busy! For my birthday Andy, Matt, my parents and I went to IHOP to eat. I had crepes with nutella (my favorite!) My sweet, sweet hubby brought home a bunch of doughnuts and candles for me to blow out and my sweet little dad made me a cake- it was super good! But the best part was when I got a card from Andy that he had signed. It was one of those moments in life you just can't define. I was a mom. I was looking at a little scribble my son had made me. I just about burst out in tears but I kept myself together. It was the best birthday present I could ever ask for! I am so blessed.

Funny Little Man

Andy thinks his dad is hysterical but for all my tryingI can't get him to laugh. Not even a little chuckle. And this whole time I thought I was the comedian and Matthew's humorneeded some work. Life's funny. Okay folks, remember.... CLICK ON THE PICTURE TO SEE VIDEO!!!

C.S. Lewis

'The time has come,' the Walrus said,
'To talk of many things:
Of shoes -- and ships -- and sealing wax --
Of cabbages -- and kings --
And why the sea is boiling hot --
And whether pigs have wings.'

I'm going to teach this to Andy. Don't ask
me why.

Thanks Eva...

"Hallelujah"

Now I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this The fourth, the fifth The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing
Hallelujah Hallelujah
Hallelujah Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied youTo a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the
Hallelujah
Baby I have been here beforeI know this room,
I've walked this floorI used to live alone before I knew you.
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
There was a time you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you
The holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was
Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah
You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of lightIn every wordIt doesn't matter which you heard
The holy or the broken
Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah
I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touchI've told the truth,
I didn't come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah Hallelujah,
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Artist rendering of Andrew

There is a little girl in our ward that comes with her grandparents to church each week. She is not a member but her grandparents bring her to church to encourage her to join. I feel bad for her because it must be boring or sort of scary since she doesn't know anyone. I wanted her to enjoy herself and have good memories of church so I let her and her grandma hold Andy during the services. She played with Andy and had him laughing harder than I have ever heard him laugh. (of course he had to do that during sacrament!) She drew this cute little picture of Andy and my favorite part is how she actually tried to count every little hair on his head and then included them in the picture. They are hard to see but they are there... I think it's adorable! Just goes to show you he's not technically bald!

Baby Ryker Is Here!!!

My cousin Nichole finally popped out her little guy on October 9th, 2008.He weighed in at a massive 8 pounds 13 ounces. (yes, I had a 4 pound baby so 8 pounds IS huge!!!) He's absolutely adorable and although I say he is

massive he really is so tiny, I forgot how small a newborn is. I'm really glad and thankful things went so well for my cousin and her baby during labor and that Ryker is in good health. It's such a blessing that he is here and doing well!